Sunday, March 19, 2006

Remember, Remember the 5th of November

I decided to skip out on the parade in Southie today, and instead went to see "V For Vendetta." All I can say is WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ALL ABOUT? The media has informed me that it has parallels to today's political climate, the Thatcher years in Britain, Nazi Germany, and other totalitarian states. Outside of the political stuff, I spotted references to works in various mediums (Batman, Phantom of the Opera, 1984, Amadeus, Zorro, Triumph of the Will, Joan of Arc, Apocalypse Now, and others). I'd warn you about spoilers, but since every commercial and trailer shows you what happens at the end of the movie, why bother? The plot was muddled and confusing. I never really understood why Natalie Portman was so bound to this guy and what exactly he meant to her. The super duper IMAX theater I saw it in comes equipped with Tempurpedic chairs that have subwoofers wired into the seats, so that every time something loud happened on screen my balls were jiggled accordingly. When Parliament blew up, I experienced something I've never come across in a movie theater - I was kind of horrified by the sight of a building that houses one of the world's great democracies exploding spectacularly to the delight of the onscreen crowd, and at the same time Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture and stupendous sound effects were being pumped into to my undercarriage with such force that I damn near creamed my pants. I walked out of the movie feeling confused and a little violated. Maybe some of my faithful readers could enlighten me as to what it all meant, and calm me down.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is the most hilarious thing I have ever read... I damn near spit out my lunch on to the screen. I am not sure I believe the part about the subwoofer seats. Time to go to the Imax theatre, for research purposes of course.

blankfist said...

It means it was time for your balls to jiggle. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Captain Mike said...

Anonymous poster, reval your true name!

Captain Mike said...

Reveal. I meant reveal!

Anonymous said...

It is the "Life is too short to drink cheaply" creator... Not cool enough to have a Blogger login.