Sunday, February 26, 2012


The snarkiness commences at 8:30

8:29 - "Mirror Mirror" looks fucking awful.

8:30 - I hope Al Green is enjoying the royalties from two consecutive commercials featuring "Let's Stay Together"

8:35 - Is Justin Bieber playing an underage male prostitute?

8:39 - James Earl Jones now looks like Admiral Ackbar from "Return of the Jedi"

8:45 - ROBERT RICHARDSON? AGAIN? No love for Lubezki?

8:54 - No Cruel Intentions in the kissing montage?

8:55 - This montage should be titled - "Remember When Movies Were Good?"

8:58 - "The Artist" for best costume design? He only had to work with two colors.

9:00 - BOOTY BATTLE!!!!

9:01 - Are they seriously getting all the technical awards over and done with up front? And why are they having all the directors and actors explain how great the techies are rather than letting them speak for themselves? Bad form!

9:08 - I want Sandra Bullock to play an evil Nazi kommandant.

9:09 - Congrats, Iran! We'll be bombing you next week.

9:13 - Berenice Bejo - hot.

9:15 - The opera boxes are reserved for sexy lady musicians.

9:20 - ABC's "Missing" - Because Ashley Judd can't open a movie anymore.

9:27 - Dragon Tattoo for editing. Didn't see that one coming.

9:29 - Sound editors are hilarious.

9:30 - Filmmaking runs on Diet Coke.

9:40 - Cirque Du Soleil - ummmmm.....

9:42 - Oscar Nominee Deathwatch 2012: Plummer vs. Von Sydow

9:43 - I love Chris Rock!

9:55 - Emma Stone is drunk.

9:56 - Oh, it's a bit.

9:57 - Hugo for visual effects... over Rise of the Planet of the Apes. Yup, Hugo's gonna win best picture.

10:01 - Kenneth Branagh is annoying.

10:02 - Sorry, Mr. Von Sydow. You're gonna have to stay alive and keep acting for a while.


10:22 - Popcorn whores!

10:27 - Angie's going for the Jessica Rabbit stance.

10:29 - I saw Nat Faxon perform at the Groundlings a while back. He was awesome. Congrats!

10:21 - Woody Allen over Kristen Wiig. Sigh.

10:40 - Milla Jovovich is perfect for the Nerd Oscars. All those techies have spent years fantasizing about her.

10:46 - Iran, Northern Ireland, Pakistan... Is your nation troubled? Make a movie. You'll probably get an Oscar.

10:53 - Michel Hazanavicius - Your name sounds like a sneeze.

11:01 - Yay! Death Montage coming up! Bring out your dead!

11:10 - No applause during the Death Montage? Bad form!

11:16 - "I've never had any of those feelings." Billy's best line so far.

11:17 - Jean Dujardin - Not sure you deserved it, but at least you didn't go The Full Benigni on us.

11:24 - Okay, I take it back. The Artist is gonna get it.

11:32 - Meryl!

11:35 - She's classy. You gotta give her that.

11:38: - The Artist - It was good. The Descendants was better

11:41 - When the biggest surprise of the night is that Meryl Streep won an Academy Award, it's a clear sign that things need to be shaken up a bit.

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